First it was the global cooling of the 1970s. Then it was the global warming of the 1990s followed quickly by “climate change”, the final cause of all weather patterns, where, no matter what the weather does, it’s bad news for mother earth. What climate calamity is coming next? Read on to learn about the latest threat: Forecast Change.
DALLAS – Somewhere in the suburbs of the DFW metroplex, a young family eagerly awaits the next weather event. “First they said ‘rain and freezing rain’. Then they said, ‘snow’. Then they just said, ‘rain only with temperatures holding steady in the low 30s,'” said little Tommy Douglas, “It’s like they don’t actually know what the weather is going to do! I’m just so confused.”
“Like, I check weather.com, and there’s this snowflake in the ten day forecast. Ten minutes later, and like, it’s gone–totally vanished. Then the next time I look, like, it’s back.” said Laura Douglas, mother of Tommy.
“Little Tommy always wants me to get him up if it snows so he can look outside. When we saw a chance in the forecast, we let him know it could happen. Now that it’s gone, he’s pretty upset.” Tommy’s father added.
While some may argue this is just an isolated anomaly, others are suggesting a conspiracy angle. Speaking on condition of anonymity, “John” at World Weather Federation (WWF) stated, “We think someone has gotten to the weathermen. Maybe they’re being paid off. Maybe it’s blackmail. Whatever it is, the public is becoming confused about our forecasting technology. Ultimately, the puppet masters behind the meteorologists are trying to make people lose faith in the forecasting system so they won’t accept the settled science of manmade climate change.”
The unusual phenomenon, dubbed “Forecast Change”, may be having its effect. Already, non-scientist, wacko, extremist climate deniers (NSWECD), had this to post:
“Remember, the people who cannot predict the weather are the same ones telling us they can predict the climate.”